Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Blip from the vegetable..

I am trying to get out of this perpetual lethargy I seem to have sunk into. Life as I knew it is changing so much that I am scared I will get be thrown out tangentially very soon. Am becoming quite completely oblivious of whats happening around me.. I think this is how it starts.
So.. I tell myself I am gonna put an end to this right now and definitely catch up more often on whats happening around me.

In keeping with the promise, here is what I bumped into today as my post lunch read. Its been a pleasure to check out Blogswara-United in music. Its a collaboration of musically oriented bloggers from around the world. Its refreshing to see how the net has really empowered to get anybody and everybody globally on a single platform to express themselves and collaborate on such a scale. There is ample details about them on their website as well as songs that you can download and listen to as well. They even have a blog site :)
Oh and btw, I came by the website via Harish's blog site which informed me that he was one of the participants of the Airtel Super singer. My Mum's been telling me about that program and good to know that its been a good show case of talents.

My feeling of being so called insignificant is really gathering momentum now :) I better start to catch up on more stuff around me..

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Of KANK, life and such...

This is an extremely long and boring blog (with some spoilers), so if you are not particularly fond of Karan Johar, Hindi movies or well... my blogs.. stop right here and please continue doing whatever you were doing..

I saw 'Silsila' when i was just about wee bit. Since then I think I have seen it just about every time it has played on TV in the different cable channels. When I started buying/collecting DVD's of the movies that I have liked through the times, this one definitely features in the list. I am a great great fan of Yash Chopra and proud to say that I have seen all of his movies starting from 'Waqt' in the 60's. (ahem, not that I saw it in the 60's d'uh! but its from then you see).
So, I have quite a few of his movies in my collection. Silsila in particular has been a movie I have enjoyed immensely (much to my mum's chagrin! Imagine a 15 yr old really liking a movie about extra marital affairs, not quite something for a mum to gloat about :p). It has the most beautiful songs and its such a brilliantly made movie, the understated performance by Jaya and Sanjeev Kumar was such a pleasure to watch. Who can forget Rekha in those halter neck blouses, man she was sexy! My mum tells me that the halter necks were a craze after that and I am not surprised .. AB is AB and I rest my case...

Before you wonder whether this is a blog about Silsila, not really.. But it does start from there and I think its also a movie that inspires KANK. We all know Karan Johar has had all the Yash Chopra movies dissolved in his daily dose of horlicks and given to him even when he was about wee bit..

I have for reasons unknown always always liked the story of silsila even though it was not a movie which rocked the box office or was much talked about (at least not for the right reasons tho', the chemistry between AB and Rekha is palpable and you can almost feel it thru the screen I kid you not!). I think the movie, for the times it was set in, was quite futuristic and the indian sensibilities did not appreciate the fact that:

a. Extra marital affair was glorified enough to make a much hyped movie about it
b. The fact that an indian woman went out of her marriage to indulge in a relationship with another man..

Both the reasons I guess were justified in those times even though it was all BS. Point remains that it is till date the most sensitively made movie about a subject which is always been so controversial.

Since my younger days whenever I used to watch that movie I really empathised with Rekha and AB. I think its also the age which makes you think that love conquers all, no matter what you should fight for your love, you are entititled to love and happiness and blah blah...I am not saying it like a bad thing mind you. But I think that is the reason why I didnt see anything wrong with that story, I still struggle to find loops in it..

I have had heated debates with friends about how there was nothing wrong in the characters to find their true love even if it existed outside of their marriage. Mainly because the marriage itself was a compromise. The premise of the story apart from the whole love bit is about choices in life or the lack of...AB's character had a choice in the movie (if you havent seen the movie, and are interested plz watch it). But he decides to go a certain way and that decision paves the path for the rest of the movie.. There will always be a question of whether you can turn back time, the thought of reversing judgements and the integrity to stand by your decisions.. All these and more make the movie that much more interesting.

Kank unfortunately for me, lacks these basic convictions to begin with. It also starts with a decision made by Rani and the life there onwards. But the gaps are too distracting after you have seen the movie (ahem btw for the record I enjoyed the movie and as always I think Karan Johar has done a good job. I just tend to hash and rehash movies after seeing them :p).
There are 2 basic faults with the movie as far as I can see:

a. The whole Rani and Abhishek's marriage falling apart bit. You really are left wondering why is their marriage falling apart. You can see that a certain chemistry is missing but beyond that there are too many other indications to say otherwise. You see a very loving husband who as far as you can see has done nothing wrong and is not someone you cannot work on. Rani's character herself is shown to be amenable to making things work which does not happen if you have fallen out of love and have nothing to hold you back. The director makes it seem like they have compatibility issues and communication problems but there is not enough indication of that in the movie, so in the end you are like - Ok, I have been told that their marriage is not working so umm. instead of breaking my head over it might as well get over it so that the movie may move on (as it is its 3.5 hrs long!)
b. Whats up with SRK's character being so obnoxious???You almost do not feel any kind of sympathy or empathy for him. There are scenes in which I admit I felt like slappng him right across and asking him to shut up.. (and that given my usual dedication for his movies is saying a lot!). His marriage story again seems quite unfortunate but at least in this case you are being told that his wife has been too busy supporting him and the family. Which is fine and believable.. But honestly according to me, the only reason (tangible reason) you can see which broke his marriage was him. It was really his character which just stopped putting in enough for the marriage. I am almost scared to think if not for that what else could have been the reason.He is really shown to be a terrible dad and a terrible husband. There is a brilliant scene where Priety asks him if a husband is too busy providing for his family why is he not blamed for the lack of involvement and that according to me is pure directional excellence. So... if its really his sullen and insecure attitude that breaks his marriage, there is really no reason why he should find happiness elsewhere. I find that quite a hypocritical loop in the movie..

But having said all that, I have to say that I did enjoy the movie a lot, every melodramatic minute of it.. I am a complete sucker for Karan Johar movies and I will always be.. Despite that fact that the movie is long and melodramatic (those are the trademarks really), you have to give credit to Karan Johar for attempting a movie like this. A spinoff of Silsila in a modern age setting must have been a daunting task.. He is really a sensitive director who I think brings out certain nuances about human relationships and women which is not very common in the usual male dominated bollywood.

The performances are superb as usual (yes, SRK hams a lot but you hafta get over it by now!). Abhishek is underused I think. I personally have a soft spot for him and I hate to see him not being given an author backed role. He is capable of soo much more. But he does shine through some of the emotional scenes and honestly its his character which is really the ace in the whole movie..
AB is a surprise package in the movie as a casanova.. I am still struggling to get over it and its a little difficult you have to believe me. He does his best to portray that flamboyance but I think its 3 decades of living and feeding on a certain image which makes it very difficult to chew this avtaar of his. But kudos to him and the director to even venture in this direction..
Preity has very little to do in the movie except to look good and maybe its for the better, its a relief to see her not so hyperactive on the screen.
Rani is good, that girl has talent for sure, we have all seen it and I think we all agree to that so like in the case of AB, I don't think I need to elaborate.
Kiron Kher looks very cute :) She is becoming the modern day screen mom now.. I was really secretly wishing something would cook up between her character and AB's. In the middle of the movie I also wondered why Karan Johar could not get Rekha to play that role! It would really have been soo coool!!

There were a few scenes that stand out in my memory really:
a. The one I mentioned previously where Preity defends her busy life by comparing it to being the bread winner of the family. It stand out because it really shows the hypocratic mentality where men (ok people!) do not hesitate to point fingers at women the moment they get any busy with their professional lives.
b. The scene where Kiron Kher asks Preity whether she can stay with her after the divorce. That was such a minscule scene but I think one which really brings out a lot about the modern sensibilities. The beautiful part is the dialogue where she says - My son did not ask me before stepping out of this marriage and you did not ask me before throwing him out of the house....Its such a subtle indication of the modern age where youngsters no longer indulge in family discussions to decide matters of life or decisions pertaining to families. Times have changed....
c. Scene towards the end where AB comes to meet Rani to invite her for the wedding. Gosh I really had a lump in my throat during that scene..
d. The dinner table scene where everybody discusses boundaries in a relationship. It was a glimpse of what a great scene it could have been. A potent scene that could have really made a difference if explored properly with some intelligent dialogues. Instead it shows us a glimmer of how it could have been with just about 2-3 dialogues but nevertheless I think quite interesting.
e. Ah, my fav really, that 10 seeconds of Kajol on screen. Man motherhood really agrees with her! She looks stunning (I never thought I will say this about Kajol of all people!). She looks ravishing in a pink sari, absolutely in shape and the smile which really makes you miss her presence in the movie..

All in all a good movie to watch, it definitely does justice to what I expected from it despite whatever glitches.. The songs are awesome and in particular Mitwa is really great! I am not sure if the sound track is as popular as B&B but Shankar, Ehsaan and Loy have definitely given a good score to back the movie..

All said and done, I really wonder whether even now I stand by the story of Silsila or not.. And somehow it causes a conflict in my sensibilities now that I am married myself.. I don't think a marriage is to be taken lightly. I am conventional, vot to do.. I truly believe that it is something which is of more permanence than anything else in your life so you better not have any doubts about it. If you do, take some time, think about it and only if you are really sure should you get into something like it.

I see people around me and I see them split into 2 categories, ones who are fast losing faith in the institution of marriage and ones who think its like a piece of footwear, you try to see if its fits you (if it doesnt try another one!). Both of which scare me because they are both extremes. Also unknown to them they are interrelated.. Its really the lack of understanding of what a marriage is and the commitment involved, which causes people to swing in either direction..

I sincerely hope and plead that if you are not convinced about marriage as an institution or do not understand it well enough, maybe just maybe its not for you. Which again is not a bad thing. Its better not to get married for the heck of it than to ruin it after you have gotten in..

The sad thing is that we are now caught between what we think we are entitled to and what we work hard at getting. Marriage as an institution in India will not really work out if we think we can always get out of it if we are not happy or not getting what we deserve. Which is also why we always look up to our parents and other family members to emote their marriage. Stable marriages in a family makes a lot of difference in the ideologies of the children. If you were brought up believing that its something we get into for social reasons or worse, that we can get out of it if we are not getting what we want, we would really be floundering to make anything work..

The pursuit of happiness is not wrong, the search for eternal love is not wrong, what is wrong is the misguided and inflated ideology with which people seem to be entering into marriage..

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Thought for the day

I noticed something yesterday in the mirror. It was a completely relaxed, glowing and smiling face staring back at me. Something believe me I probably havent seen since I was probably 18 and yes that was long time ago :)

And immediately what struck me also was the fact that this is what we lose out on being the overambitious women that we have tend to become now. And I don't even mean overambitious as a bad thing. And I don't mean overambitious in a purely professional sense. I mean ambitious in every sphere of life. Wanting just about everything. I know thats how I am..

In the eternal race to achieve everything, we miss out on taking time to be, we miss out on chalking time out for yourself for the little things that you want to do. It could be something as simple as making sure you use ample moisturiser everyday. I know that personally, I obsess about moisturiser. Its been my bane for the last 7 years that I have been working. I have always felt that I dont get enough time to do silly things which as a woman I should be doing and am entitiled to and not to mention enjoy doing. Why do we let that race to achieve things, the hunger for greater things (which we intuitively know we are capable of and defeinitely have a right to), get in the way of being and enjoying being a woman?

So i tried to time things that I have been doing lately, now that I have very less to do..
a. Cooking for about an hour
b. Half an hour to an hour time out for all your cosmetic needs
c. Gym everyday and yoga twice a week
d. Sleep for at least 9 hours a day.

Ok, so now what is it that stops me from doing any of this on a normal week day when I work? I find myself at a loss of ideas. Is it the lack of required hours per day ? Is it the lack of enough energy and enthusiasm? It could well be a combination of that and more..Lack of motivation at the end of a tiresome 10 hour day is not that far fetched.

But I worry, for myself and for other women like me who unknowingly are losing out on more things than one. The ability to take care of yourself as a woman, the ability to relax on a daily basis, the awareness of stress that we carry along all day. All this and more. I know we want it all and we will compromise and adjust and re-adjust to make it happen. But maybe, just maybe we can help the situation..

This is how I figure it, life is probably not gonna get any saner. I sincerely believe that the 20's are the most time for yourself that you are gonna get. The 30's are crazy, you definitely have family, children and mortgages to worry about. Being a woman will get even crazier in 30's. Kids, schools, maids, house cleaning and not for forget in Laws! Yes, I am anticipating all that and more in my future I can tell ya! (which is why I am only too glad to push all that out till I hit the big 3 O)

Anyways, since I am already aware of that fact, maybe its time to salvage the rest of my 20's (ok fine late 20's :p) and maybe, just maybe, that little will go a long way.

Why should I lose out on something so intrinsic and something thats definitely so worthwhile. Maybe it will take some more time crunching, but wouldn't you want to do that now while you can and that time doesn't belong to anyone else? I think so..

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Scoop!

A very refreshing movie in the recent times bar none. Every year I guess there is something that comes along completely as a pleasant surprise, last year it was 'Kiss kiss bang bang'. Another masterpiece and quite a case of serendipity as far as I am concerned but more of that later.
This year its 'Scoop' ! A Classic Woody Allen comedy.

Sondra: I think he might ask me to marry him
Sidney: Your family is quite conservative, do you think they will accept a serial killer ?

Absolutely understated but yet in your face kinda comedy if you get my drift. Its been a pleasure to see Woody back in action and oh what an action it is.

Scarlett (and I do like that name btw) is perfect in her role. I think she is Woody's new gal friday really! I think her looks are deliberately understated for the character that she's playing coz otherwise she is quite stunning. She has come a long way from the freakish 'Lost in Translation'. I wish she does more roles like these where she seems more at ease.
Beautiful and yet quite sneaky as the budding american journalist in London.

Woody is the neurotic and twitchy Splendini who gets caught up in the action by the virtue of being at provider of the molecule defragmentor (ha watch it I tell ya :p). Nothing else I will say would really justify this guy's passion for movies and good looking women. He's been accused of being repetetive but when what is served is so delicious, I would not mind a tad bit of repetitions or second helpings for that matter.
Hugh Jackman, o gosh, everytime he's on the screen it just lights up (at least for me it does). He's unbelievably good looking! Much trimmer and in shape than he was in X-men and boy this character is far from anything like that. He also fits the role of a previledged Brit I must say. Ok, and I can go on and on about him but thats not really a point, I am the greatest fan of Hugh Jackman but this movie is out and out Scarlett's and Woody's who shine as amateur investigative journalists.

The humour is classic Woody, script is a bit out there but when its so funny you rarely tend to question the rather mundane logic in things. Dialogues will grab you when you least expect them and don't be surprised if you laugh your guts out when you do catch the drift of it. This is a must see for all Woody fans and definitely is a nice summer movie.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Procrastination is my current theme..

Put it off for later is my anthem.. Days are flowing by, my to-do list is mounting by the day..

How much did I plan to do during my time off, plenty. How much have I done, hardly!

More than anything else, I promised myself I will change my blog template. Even started doing it but blame HTML for not making this simpler! Tried to be smart and started fooling around with Div tags.. Promptly found out that my changes were working in Firefox but completely screwed up in IE. Swore never to touch existing templates again. I will search till I find a free template online if my friends are generous enuf to point me to one. If I don't get it, Hmmppf, I stay with dis one !

Have been making very very efficient use of Netflix I must say. There isn't a day when I am not watching a movie, wanted to write a few more reviews for the sweet people who take out time to drop by to read moi reviews! Where did I get with that? Nowhere, half written stuff lying in my drafts folder going nowhere.

I think all your inspiration dies out the moment you have time for it. Its like a no-win situation. You think you have no time to be inspired or write stuff but when you have all the time, no momentum, no muse..

Wanted to organize my mp3 player, started doing it, but realized its not really a simple task. I mean, the idea is straightforward of course. You want to classify songs per language, per genre, per movie, per singers/band. So in theory not that difficult at all. But if you knew me better you will also know that I am not organized by nature, I am random at best! So, the songs I listen to, the playlists I make are random. A vague fear gripped me when I made that first folder in my jukebox. What if I am in the mood to listen to only peppy numbers. Umm how am i gonna get peppy numbers out of the 20 odd folders that I am planning to make now.. And that thought had me mortified.. If you knew me, you will also know that I am the laziest person on the earth, to traverse thru 20 odd folders to make a playlist is not my idea of fun..

So in the end, here are a few of my folders...
2004
2005
NJ
Favs
Oldies
Angrezi
Random
........and many more such...

So, you see what a disaster that organizing activity was :p

Out of everything else, I think my main accomplishments would definitely include:

a. Dedication towards Yoga judging by how religiously I have been going for my classes.
b. Charmed - watching almost 3 hours of this series every day! I mean thank god, they made 8 seasons of it, means a lot of episodes to go around..

Ah.. Almost left out the best part.. I now have all the 4 seasons of 'Coupling'. The saving grace!

Hmmpff! Doctors!

Doc: So what do you think is contributing to the pain in your shoulders?
Me: Well, I am not sure. (Ahem, aren't you the doctor???)
Doc: But there must be something that you are doing which needs to be stopped, can you think of something?
Me: I do tend to read a lot..
Doc: Do you think you can stop doing that for a while ? Just to check..
Me: Stop reading ?? (Bewildered and... Are you kidding me?!)
Doc: What else can you stop doing?
Me: Umm.... (Is this going anywhere..)
Doc: What about the way you sleep, how is that?
Me: Mostly on my tummy and usually all coiled up...
Doc: Can you stop doing that?
Me: Ahem.. I don't think so.. You see its quite involuntary.. (Well that and the fact that my mum's been trying to make me sleep properly since I was 2 and she hasnt succeeded)
Doc: What about working on the comp, you said you are not working anymore.
Me: Yes, most of what I do nowadays is squat at home and just check mails a few times a day.
Doc: Can you stop even that?
Me: ?? (Really ? You think I have any chance of survival without checking all my zillion mails ?)
Doc: Ok what else, there doesn't seem to be many sustained postures in your daily activity, but you still seem to have a lot of pain. What about sitting?
Me: (ok, by now losing patience, he wants me to stand all day ??) Umm.. I do think I know how to sit and all that plus we have a very comfy couch..(:p)
Doc: What about standing..
Me: (About to bash him up now!) What ?
Doc: You know standing for a prolonged period could cause tension in your shoulder..
Me: (this has to be a joke) Ummm.. I am hardly standing and doing anything. I dont really believe in overworking myself.. (Plus its not like I do any work around the house, you see hubby and I have a deal, I cook and he cleans.. Dishes, house, everything else...)
Doc: But there must be something, can you think about this and get back to me.
Me: (And I am paying you for this ???)